Saturday 24 November 2012

Week 8 Review Pt1

You probably didn't follow my live tweets through this week's show so I've included them in this post as they do capture the good, the bad and the ugly tonight.

It's Abba and Motown Week which means there's a good chance we'll recognise the tracks. This is traditionally a harmless week when no-one does terribly well and no-one does terribly badly. 

To start with the judges have this and that to say about last week's Ella vote fiasco.

They might just as well have four OAPs on the panel for all the influence the judges have now
@radioleary is really sounding quite fed up. Has he seen the votes already?
Cue video of Rylan and James in a kitchen. It's Thanksgiving in America so someone on the production team must have thought it would be a good idea. But where's her third act??

Is Jahmene the turkey? #XFactor thanksgiving meal

Rylan suits Abba well. of is it vice versa? It's a chess set and he puts on a pretty reasonable performance and looks like he's enjoying himself.

Rylan is certainly entertaining. Lots of pawn action tonight on#XFactor

Good job Louis - bigging up Rylan in an effort to get rid of Baloney#XFactor
Louis almost begging people to vote for the guy in his complimentary summary,

UnionJ should have been told that The Winner Takes It All is not a smiley song
The boy band sing very well but this really is not a track when they should be smiling and the whole impact of a superbly written song is totally lost.

Good performers but crap representation of this track could land them in trouble

Lord Sugar tweets to Simon Cowell: I am not wishing to be negative. You get back here and do X Factor UK yourself and chuck Tulisa out. I'm not sure what he doesn't like about Tulisa but I thought I'd ride on the back of that one:
@SimonCowell unlike @Lord_Sugar I am wishing to be negative. Get back here and do #XFactor yourself and chuck Baloney out.

Jahmene does I Had A Dream but it's lame.
I'm bored with Jahmene now which doesn't say much for his chart chances, however well he sings. My vicar sings well too.

I wish Jahmene would just hit the note not wobble round it first.

Jahmene did say he wanted to do gospel so by leaving out half the track I suppose he got gospel

I think I preferred watching Agnetha and Anni-Frid but James is miles better than the others at interpreting ABBA songs

James Arthur does SOS. Not as brilliant as some of his earlier interpretations but still the best so far.

I have a feeling Ella voters may well transfer to James and keep him out of the bottom two this week

'Last week was amazing' Big smile. Baloney sounding chirpy is pissing me off. Funny how his nerves have gone.

Damn, Fernando was one of my favourites. I'm going for a walk. I may be some time. 

Has, he. finished. yet. All. those. gaps. between. every. ruddy. word. Baloney has to go, please.

Next we get the Motown performances.
UnionJ pick I'll Be There and we miss Michael Jackson even more now. They sing really well but that won't have won any extra votes. Maybe they won't need them  but I have my doubts.

UnionJ playing it safe in the Motown section. Maybe a bit too safe

Gary talking sense. It was a 'nice' performance. UnionJ should have done Baby Love

Louis doesn't want UnionJ in the bottom... eh? 

Any of UnionJ as solo acts would have seen off Baloney ages ago

Then we get a mix-up with Nicole getting confused with so many acts still in the competition.
Hang on, didn't Nicole just introduce James? Video intro is Rylan

'James' has grown and changes sexual preference.

Christ Rylan's trousers look uncomfortable. Should help with high notes

Rylan doing Jive Bunny

Not one of Rylan's better performances. If he's Eurovision then Baloney is Eurocrisis.

I can see #RylanStyle catching on

Rylan does a Supremes' medley in very tight yellow satin trousers. Muddley might have been a better word.

No question to answer on the #XFactor competition. That'll help the Baloney voters then.

Dermot chats to the audience and we get a shot of a ridiculous horizontal pigtail style on the head of Jahmene's mum.

Jahmene's mum's hair!?

James Arthur showing Jahmene how notes should be sung and what performing is all about. Brilliant. 

Caroline Flack is hoping James will take a cold shower before he appears on #XtraFactor

Jahmene is asking his mum what that song was actually all about. And can Louis borrow her hair

James puts on the best performance tonight. That was pretty good as he tries Marvyn Gaye's Let's Get It On.

Digital Spy tweet: Front page of tabloid alleges Maloney tried to strangle a cabaret singer on a cruise ship. So macho, as @sinittaofficial might say!

Ooops, dodgy notes from Jahmene. This song is muh more difficult than most people realise. Smokey was brilliant. Jahmene isn't

Remembering last week, a bet on Jahmene at 50-1 to go may not be that silly. Shocking but not silly. 

Jahmene really doesn't do that well with the Motown track. In fact I've already forgotten what it was. Oh yes, Smokey Robinson. He's a nice innocent chap but not for the X Factor world. Better back in church where listeners will be kinder and not swear or talk about girls and things he doesn't understand. Like charts.

Dancing on the ceiling? Baloney? Good God no.

Baloney's dancing is more like someone old trying to stand still on a rocking boat. Which is where he belongs

Digital Spy again: Maloney took our breath away. Then he released his grip.

Baloney gets criticism from the judges becauses he's a crap act. Simple, Gary. If he wasn't your act you'd say the same.

One of the highlights comes in XtraFactor when we get a video of James and Nicole singing an off the cuff, make it up as they go along song. I can't really explain what V and HB stands for without losing half my readers but that was really funny and showed a confident contestant and very relaxed mentor. No way would we see Britney in that style! Well done, Nicole.

I can see James and Nicole YouTube V & HB track going viral! Hilarious 

Finally, Simon appears to have got the earlier message!

"@SimonCowell: UK. Please vote for who you believe could be a star next year. It's in your hands." http://bit.ly/QEtFLk 


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